Saturday, February 23, 2008


STONER GODDESS
image courtesy of




The 4th of July
by Pie

My dad was a big fan of Kerouac's and when Kesey came along he was added to the list. When he found out I was a Prankster groupie he came all the way back from Hawaii to meet them. I took him to an Acid Test one night and he came away sadly disappointed. He said the Pranksters were cretinous and Kesey was annoying. The problem was he neglected to drink the kool-aid. He regretted it for years.

I was just thinking about another time my dad and I went with some friends of mine in an old bread truck over to Kesey's place in La Honda. When we got there everyone was involved in some kind of a spaceship role playing game and they were letting people out of the house on tethers. My dad got Kesey to sign a book for him. He enjoyed that more than he did the Acid Test.
The first time my dad ever smoked a joint was one Saturday night in Yuma Arizona. We were sitting on the floor watching Don Kirschner's Rock Concert. Before he knew it Old Dad was rocking back and forth, gettin' down to the beat. He looked up briefly and said in a monotone voice to no one in particular, "I'm finally beginning to understand rock."


I was at an Acid Test where Jerry Garcia's first wife drew little pictures on your hand so you could get back in. Later the Pranksters copied it and gave readings as well. Don't remember the years. Maybe I'll ask J.

J.'s my cousin. He's straightened out a lot. Just got married a year or so ago for the first time -- he's 53, met a girl on the 'net and they're hunkered down now for the long run. He's Church of Christ, Bible-thumpin' straight man, but I'll give it a try. We were at Altamont on acid when the shootin' started. Everything got reeeeeeaaaaaalllll ssssslllloooowww. Damn. We were right up front, too. The next thing I knew I was pukin' in the parkin' lot. I thought he was going to have to drive us home and that would've been bad. All the way back he kept saying, "you're doing fine, you're doing fine." What did he know. He's blind. And the car was on it's side and all the manequins in the windows of the strip malls were go-go dancing. Oh god. I thought I'd die. We stayed up all night and to cheer ourselves up decided to drive on down to San Bernardino County to Crestline, which now is a pile of ashes. A guy just opened a T-shirt shop here in town who is from there. He probably wasn't even thought of by that time. I have to remember how many kids I had to pinpoint the year.

Nobody hired the Angels for bouncers. They were supposed to help with parking and get free beer. They aren't cops and they don't police anybody or anything. Jesus. What lies.


No it wasn't MG. She came later. I remember MG. I think the girl's name was Sarah or something like that. Don't remember. Yes, MG's daughter is named Sunshine and Zane doesn't sell the book. I'm looking for a copy, tho, and hopefully, I can get Babbs to have her sign it. MG showed up the night we painted the bathrooms in the Longshoremen's Hall with day-glo paint. The cops were unplugging the amps and she was running along behind them plugging them back in. We were all just ripped and I couldn't stop laughing from the Kool-Aid. A couple got into a fight and the guy left and somehow the girl was up onstage trying to find him. She kept saying his name in the microphone and they would distort the sound so that it echoed all through the hall and everyone started saying the guy's name. God. My ribs hurt just thinking about it. There was another time, or maybe it was that time, who remembers, when Cassady, the driver of all vehicles, directed whomever was driving the bus, to back into a stop sign and knock it over. Some old women were walking up the street and Cassady was miming like he was trying to hide the downed stop sign behind his back. oh god. I'm laughing too hard.


I heard from my friends that MG showed up on the dock when they were going to go scatter Jerry's ashes. Debra wouldn't let MG on the boat and Sunshine said, "Come on Debra, she's my mother," or words to that effect. And Debra said, "Are you sure?" God. Talk about the C-word. I think I'd kick Debra's ass if I ever saw her. One of the guys, Bobby maybe? tried to jump off the boat because MG couldn't come but it was too late. Poor MG. I always liked her. She was my favorite Prankster.

I think I love the Dead and Airplane and those guys so much because they were ours and we all grew up in the same neighborhood. Went to a yard/garage sale on the corner of Haight and Fillmore -- the only reason I stopped was because I used to live there and the bottom floor, which is a garage for parking everyone in the building, used to overflow with Harleys.

Those were the days, my friend, the wine-drinkin', pot-smokin' , acid-droppin', partyin'-yer-ass-off-and-livin'-to-tell-about-it days.

If I did half that stuff now I'd be in the ER so fast my head would spin if it weren't already.


** The Rock Pipe: Shaped curiously like a part of the female genitalia. Men don’t like it as a rule. I usually smoke it with my lesbian friends.

Wavy Gravy! *What we have in mind -- is breakfast in bed for 300,000!*
Wow. My second ex husband was there. I took the brown acid beforehand and couldn't get into the van when my friends came by for me.

I meant to ask you, as I've seen a lot of these posts before, who is the Hinton you are talking about? That was my last name when I was married to ex.

Make that 710 Ashbury, not Haight.

Don't be telling that story around.
People are going to think I want something and the kid's an ass.

It is a very sad story and I'm a better person for it. I learned that no matter how much you love someone, no matter how long you grieve, the only person you can do anything about is yourself. I -- no one else -- am responsible for how I choose to feel. I also learned that today's thoughts tend to materialize -- for good or evil -- in future events. I keep short accounts and there are enough people on this old planet who have a lot of love inside them and no one to give it to. These are my children and my family. None of that nuclear shit for me. I just didn't realize it soon enough. I have a great daughter, tho, and she gave me 3 wonderful grandchildren, who have made my old heart heavy with gratefulness and appreciation.

So you habla some espanol, too?
I lived in Arizona for 8 years. You don't get out of there without at least a little pidgin. *mota*, *boracho*, *cervesa*, and of course, *peenchy* I have an XXX-rated column that almost didn't run it was so racy about something that happened on another trip to Mexico. Karen and I went down there to shop one time and these guys tried to pick us up. I got the cute little one. He offered me turquoise to have a little drinkie with him. I told him how old I was and he said, "I don' wan' to teeeeech, aye wan to learn!

You asked about how I met Babbs.

Many moons ago, a bunch of us were coming back from Big Sur in an old van that was falling apart. About two years ago, I got into an argument with some friends who also were there, over who was driving. Then we started betting money on the whole thing and it got to be quite a tidy sum. They said Babbs was driving. I said it was another guy named Biker Bob. Everyone sided against me, insisting it was Babbs. I was off work and hadn't signed up for my early soc.sec. yet so I contacted Babbs and asked who was driving. He said it was another Prankster cohort named Page Browning. Here's the story:
Coming back from Eselan at Big Sur http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Esalen_Institute

-- I think that was the time I met HST
-- something about clubbing a wild cat to death with a hammer sounds familiar -- and we were in an old van with only a driver's seat and bad brakes. We were taking turns sitting up front riding shotgun. I was the most likely because I fit and had some padding on my ass at that time. The passenger seat either was a metal tool box or maybe a big ice chest. We all had beers in one hand and a joint in the other. We'd been making chains out of those pop tops that come off beer cans and I decided to make a headband, which I was wearing at the time. Because many of us were caravanning, we were following someone else down the mountain when all of a sudden, someone up front stopped and everyone else had to stop suddenly. I, of course, with my metal headband, went flying into the windshield, spilling beer everywhere. I came sorta to, and turned around and looked at the driver through the blood flowing down my face. He said one word: "Jesus." I said something like, "Hey, yeah, man, really." The driver then said, "No, man, you look like Jesus!"
Babbs remembered the conversation as occurring in a pickup. I think it was a van because I remember turning around and talking to the other people over my left shoulder -- and of course, passing the joint -- who were sitting with their legs extended behind me.
At any rate, I won all the money because my friends didn't remember who I'd thought was driving, only that it wasn't Babbs. So I used the money wisely and signed up to be a skypilot.
http://skypilotclub.com


I remember sunbathing nude at Esalen http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Esalen_Institute
-- pardon the earlier misspelling, I was high and I blithered -- I got so high smoking pot that I passed out. My friends were afraid I would get burnt to a crisp so they turned me over and left me there all day. I was nearly incapacitated with the burn, which would not have been that bad if I'd kept my chonies on. You really know you've done something the first time you sunburn your bumm. Not only that but the bottoms of my feet were blistered. HA! I could walk over steaming alien slime and never feel a thing on those puppies now. They're like hooves. And the feet are in pretty good shape, too.

Back to my aunt W., she lived in O, Ore., and was my designated foster parent when the state of CA relieved my mother of the burden. Dad was drying out at the VA in Honolulu. I went back to the Bay Area to stay with another aunt, J.'s mom, one summer.

When they put me on the bus I had on eyeliner, a pleated skirt and angora sweater, tights and a beret. When I came back, I was wearing a Pakistani bedspread and love beads and not much else.

Some friends brought me back up to Sutherlin and I called Aunt W. to come get me at the bus station, that being the place where I asked to be let off. Thinking I'm calling from T's house, W. says, "Don't come back up here now, the hippies have come to town. I just saw them. They're driving an old Pepsi truck and they crossed out the Pepsi and it just says 'Say Please' on it!"

That, of course, was my friends on their way up to Kesey's near Springfield.

People are going to ask you, "Who is that wild woman? Are you sure she's even female? She sounds like a super soldier!"

Actually, I'm calm compared to earlier days, but why walk when you can fly, right?


They're burnin' the devil tonight and it's gonna get reeeeeaaalll hot out!*
* When I first came to Y. I worked in local mini marts until I could find a real job. One of the first nights I worked was a full moon and an old, toothless, homeless woman kept coming in telling me that. I thought it was cool so now I just use it as an expression.

Amanda used to say, "Sometimes you don't recognize the devil until he has his hand in your pants."
And that was when I knew that any friend of the devil was a friend of mine.
to be continued ...

On subject of casting to soon to be major motion picture
THE ELECTRIC KOOL-AID ACID TEST:


I liked Jack Nicholson's line in Good as it Gets: Go sell crazy somewhere else, lady, we're all stocked up here.
Keanu, Matthew McCon. and Russell Crowe? Damn. Too bad Indiana Jones is as old as he is. He'd a made a great one for Babbs, but I don't see Harrison Ford riding shotgun. He usually drives. Keanu is just a pretty face unless he's doing an evil part. He has a penchant for those. You thought about Johnny Depp? Now there's a versatile actor.
MG? There was someone in a movie a while back who looked remarkably like Carolyn when she was younger. Let me think and I'll get back. Forget Brittney. I hate all these goofy kids running around pretending that they're big stars after doing a couple of Friends episodes.


Christian Slater for Kesey, and Johnny Depp for Babbs.

Here's one a friend of mine told me about. Maybe Zane or Cap'n remembers it:
Further, loaded to the gills, chugging over the Siskiyous on its way to Kesey's near Eugene. People inside, people outside on top of the bus. The ones riding on top were wrapped in down-filled sleeping bags. The wind blew the stuffing out of the bags, obscuring drivers' visions three-cars-deep behind them. Someone dubbed it The Great Duck Storm of 196?
rock on dude.


We can use the guy who played Gollum in Lord of the Rings for Bear. (don't post. He'll kill me. And I am afraid.)


oh baby, make me cry.
Do you know all the words by heart or do you have to look them up?

I've found that drummers have especially good rhythm.

You're not going to post any of this are you? Because if you do, I want half the proceeds.

When it rains, it pours. And the rain falls on the just and the unjust. And I just don't have enough sense to come in out of it.

Have you lived there all your life or have you ever been out here at all in the Free World?

I'm kidding now, but if I don't hear from you by -- well, let's say, later ... the teasing will begin in full force.

And because you get up before I do, you can make the coffee in the morning. I like Starbucks verona, freshly ground.

I remember once burning all my eyelashes off watching toast toast on acid.

Well, it was nice that we came at the same time.

"You know I'd never do that to you, "she said,
and licked her lips with her moist pink tongue ...

Do you like it if I talk and tell you about it while I'm doing it?

Hell, I'm a chick. I can take care of that.

Baby make me know you love me so and then
Let's twist again like we did last summer...

What's in it for me besides the adventure?

oh god oh god oh god i'm so hot my pussy hurts

Because that's how you think of me.
Because you want to be inside me and feel like you're coming home.


I was thinking those exact same words. You know, before the internet, the closest thing we had was the Whole Earth Catalog.
Oh yeah, and there's no diseases on the 'net. Just your computer gets a virus or something. And it's free. Nobody knows, and you get some great shit to put in a book later. Or not.


It's more complicated than that. I can't prove who I am. Or actually, who I was. It all started on the Harmonic Convergence.

I have a magic tongue

It must be the dimples. There's definitely something about you that I can't put my finger on. but if you take it out of your pants I'll run my tongue around the top like it's my favorite ice cream cone. Then I'll take the whole thing into my mouth all the way down my throat and back out a couple of times. Then I'll run my tongue up the bottom of it all the way to the top and around and around really slow until your ass is clenched so tight you think you're going to die. But I won't let you come until I'm ready.
What are you thinking now?

Is it warm? Do you feel me breathing on your stomach?

stay with me baby, real slow, hot, in and out.

A book!

will it be XXX-rated?
I can't get my damned font straightened out?
ok. Is this a little better?
Are you going to write about hippies running around naked licking each other all over?

do you want to?

I try


Sometimes I make a lot of racket. Is that OK?


You know I am. I'm holding it in my right hand, squeezing it on the sides, thinking about the feel of you inside me. I'm giving off this little scent so that it smells slightly musky in here. I'm rubbing my clit now and it's wet and soft down there and getting hotter

However many times you make me come

that was pretty good, wasn't it? Later, I'll tell you my movie set fantasy.

Didn't anyone ever teach you how to eat pussy? Only a woman can teach it right. Wait until I get my legs wrapped around you baby.

So, what are your deep dark secrets? Been in 'Bama forever? Did you notice that 'Bama and 'Fornia both are states with four syllables? Except 'Fornia sounds like you're telling someone nicely to fuck off.

Are you still there? Or are we just two ships going bump in the night?

only if she were over 18, and wanted to be seduced

Broke down and got myself off this a.m. Just couldn't stand it any more.
Guess I don't need you now.
Just kidding. It would make a good song tho' and with a little work, could be a haiku.

I'm just too good to be true. How much is a ticket to B'ham?
Oh, I remembered the song I was thinking about, Joan Baez, I think, something about Boulder to Birmingham.

There've been two guys in my life who are responsible for everything I am today as a sexual woman.The first was Cassady; the second was the other Robert guy I told you about last night or sometime yesterday.
I was just thinking about all the truly kinky stuff I've done in my life, and that this is by far the most novel. I've never burned up the virtual lines with anyone before now in my life. So that means I won't forget you, baby.
kisses

Well, after all those fights we're going to have over the things on which we disagree we will have great make-up sex.
kisses baby

Un-huh, un-huh, ya thought I wouldn't get ya now, didn't ya, un-huh, huh
Tell me somethin' good
Tell me that you like it, oh yeah.

oh fuck. I lost that card with your phone number on it. it's lying around out there somewhere.

oh yeah: after some serious consideration I will relent and allow vibrators from time to time if you don't press me for anal sex. And don't ask to tie me up. I had a couple of very bad experiences that I don't care to try to overcome in this life.

"In some cases the church grants dispensation"
-- Shirley McClain to Clint Eastwood in "Two Mules for Sister Sarah"

I missed out on Paul Krassner's books. I wasn't asked to contribute personally, but I received information from people who were, and they said I had better stories. Upon reading the books, I agree. So when I saw your solicitation for stories about the acid tests, I wasn't going to get passed up again. And you took it from there, baby, you and those damned dimples and all your sweet talk. And I'm a sucker for it. I love it that you have to listen to me until I finish, unlike the telephone.
If this is love, so be it. But I haven't felt like this since I was in high school. thanks, baby;
fa-lettin'-me, be mice elf, a-gain.
Love is a rose and you better not pick it
Only grows when it's on the vine
Handful of thorns and you know you've missed it
Lose your love when you say the word *mine*



It's 1:10 a.m. on my planet and I had to go out and take a picture of this pretty little plant who looked so perfect with water reflecting off her happy leaves. If all we ever do is ache for each other this is still the hottest thing I've done in a long, long time. You make me feel like dancin'. So I did. I shed my clothes and danced out in the back yard. The dogs thought I'd lost it. I don't think anyone saw me except you and god, but who cares if anyone did. They'd say, "that is one happy chick. you go, girl!" But the sagacious ones know that a gypsy spirit dances by the light of the ancient moon.
I wish none of us had bodies,that we were only consciousness floating around in bubbles. My cousin Jeff is blind, I wish we all were. Yeah, we live in the same world, we just see different things.
does that mean we can't fuck?


stay with me, baby.

I didn't sleep a wink last night until about 6 a.m. this morning. I kept thinking about you and I got up and got my self off three more times. Now I have this honeymoon thing where I'm so sore I can't walk but my pussy wants more.
I lay in bed with my eyes closed wishing it were you next to me sleeping. I pretended you were and in my mind, I watched your chest rise and fall while you breathed steadily, unaware of my presence. I didn't want to wake you, but I have so many feelings inside me right now that I don't recognize. I want to shower you with those feelings like a warm blanket of strawberries, curl up in the crook of your arm with my head on your chest and fall into a deep dreamless sleep.



So what does all this mean? Anything really? You say tomato and I say tomato. It's still spelled the same way. And you know what? It still means the same thing. Why does any of this matter anyway? We have found an escape from the real world in each other. We can talk to anybody about those other things, but how often do you find someone who appreciates the same good things in life that you do? We're not in heaven, and like Rosanne Rosannadanna said, It jus goes to show ya, it's always sumpthin.
So instead of looking for things over which we disagree, count the things we see in each other and move forward into the light. Hypothetical arguments are a waste of time.
I grew up out here, you grew up back there and the die is cast, but when we are together things are different. We create our own reality, albeit a virtual one.
I'm not afraid this time.
You said all the right words, baby. No matter what you say or do now, it's already done. You can't un-ring a bell, can you? You spoke the words I put out as a fleece, and set into motion a series of events that will make our senses reel for the rest of our lives.

Can you still smell me on your fingers?
Here's the spooky story I was going to tell you earlier:
I was basing flake with an industrial electrician from Utah named C. at a picnic table in Lush Meadows -- the same picnic table where Cowboy went down on me one beautiful spring afternoon some years prior -- down near Yosemite National Forest. C. and I talked about a lot of things that day, surprisingly, many of which I still remember. Especially the story C. related to me that occurred when he was still a young Mormon virgin.

His family was conservative by any standards with the usual sexual taboos in place. There was a girl in the small town where he lived who had a racy rep. One day at the county fair, our young knight hooked up with the soiled lillie and they rode a couple of rides together and had a pretty good time.
Walking down the midway, the girl admired a matching ring and bracelet at one of the shooting galleries hawking cheap prizes. Chris was a pretty good shot, having grown up in a rural environment, and decided to try his luck.
He won the prize, and with it, the maiden's heart. She sweetened the pot when he placed the cheap trinkets on her wrist and finger. I remember Chris' words when he, being a country boy at heart, told me in his soft slow country drawl, "And she thought them was real nice."
Back at the car they began to kiss, and Chris decided to drive up to a secluded make-out spot. Things progressed until he had his fingers up inside the girl while she moaned and writhed on the back seat.
Now this is the insane part:
It felt like something inside of her grabbed onto his fingers and was pulling him somewhere. At first he was confused but became truly concerned when he couldn't extract himself. Finally, pulling himself away from her, he got back behind the wheel and took the girl home.
Neither spoke of the incident and when he told me this story, Chris said it was the first time he ever had said it out loud. He had no idea what happened. He wasn't smoking dope yet, he was maybe a young teen, and a lame one at that.
Later on, Chris went off and joined the Navy because by that time he was old enough to be rebellious and he wanted to piss off his parents. He saw the girl around town from time to time but for some strange reason they never acknowledged each other and no one ever knew about their time together.
Some years later, the girl, who by now was a woman if she wasn't before, went missing. Her body was found a long time -- many, many years -- afterward. Her body had decomposed to a skeleton. She died from blunt force trauma to her head and it looked like somebody -- bikers, maybe? -- did a real number on her. Her body was stuffed into an old suitcase and put under an old vacant house, where it remained until someone died and the house was sold. The new people moving into the house were in the middle of renovations when they found the suitcase.
Her remains were identified by the ring and bracelet she wore from the moment young C. placed them on her hand.
Now if that's not a Dean Koontz story I'll eat your ... well ...
He'd probably mess up the ending, tho', so I'm giving it to you if you want it.
I have lots of things I want to give to you if you want them. Warm, soft, sweet musky things. Parts of my soul, you already have my heart.



That's what you like about me. I found out a long time ago that the only men who are attracted to me are either gunnybag nuts or too young to know any better. So which one are you?
Out of my mind. Indeed!
I'm wearing a hot little Motley Crue tshirt that's tattered, but it's supposed to be that way, and some very tight levi short shorts so I can show off my tan. Every once in a while the tatters on the tshirt shift and shows an inviting glimpse of my brown, flat belly.
The seam in the shorts is riding on my clit so that every time I move it's a new experience in *unrequited love*. Each step, every time I move my ass in the chair while I'm writing this, every single thing I do reminds me of what we did. And I want more.
I don't know what you've done to me but this is worse than waiting out the minutes when you're jonesin' for dope before you learned not to go that far.
Surely to god I'd never let a man in like this again. But you slipped in baby, you and your bottle of baby oil slipped in and now I'm jonesin' for your hard cock inside me.I know you and I know you know me. We've done this thousands of times and every time is like the first -- all-consuming passion that lasts over lifetimes. I know we've been together before. We are exactly alike in our spirits, and those are hungry spirits. We're both seekers; right-brained artistic seekers. We write. Words are our art form. I've never used them like this with anyone else before, only spoken them -- but this time it is so different, it's like coming home after a long, long time; like when I was a kid and that cute boy moved in down the street and my stomach felt all squishy inside every time I saw him.
Is it love? Is it a biological urge? Is this how animals feel? I know there is a feral carnality ripping through my body right now like no drug ever has. I know you feel it too. It's happened before, hasn't it. Do you remember? Get out your cards. Meditate. And yes, you definitely are a Taurus. But maybe you can use your earth sign power to ground me out, stop these flames in my pussy before anyone notices.


Oh baby, if I kick you, it will be only because you are snoring.
OK, I have to tell you something (I love it when I say that to you and your voice gets all serious and you ask "what?")
I'm a blanket hog.


Be vigilant, sure, but kick back and let it all go, too.
Party and smoke dope. Feel safe in my arms.

Is it really good to know I'm here? What does it do for you? Are you goofing on me now? I can't tell but I love that dirty little laugh.

So, what exactly was your mood when you said I'm out of my fucking mind? Anger? Disgust? Think about my tongue on the underside of the head of your cock making you whimper like a scared little boy. Nice being out of your fucking mind, yes no?

God, you're here. And my blood pressure is rising again. I thought I'd gotten through it. Almost.

I was layin' in bed
Wond'rin' if she'd changed at all
If her hair was still red.
(If her cards were still read)
...
She turned around and looked at me
While I was walkin' away
I heard her say over my shoulder
We'll meet again some day
On the avenue -- tangled up in blue ...
from me to you.
Your gypsy dances by the light of the ancient moon ...

My full name is Shekhinah Mountainwater and I was born about 10-thousand years ago.
And I know all the verses.

Do I have time to go back and call? How long will you be there baby? About 6 inches?
Is it that long?
Oooohhhhhhhh I better pull in those horns or somebody's gonna notice.


Oh honey. If I were there I'd rub your back and everything else that hurts. Everybody needs to be touched. Just touched.

Can I watch?

I dream about doing strange things I've never seen in my life with you.


Do you appear and disappear as if by magic?


G. asked what set me onto you and I said you gave me a phallic kudzu. We were high and I blithered and god only knows what he heard, but he told his roommate that some guy got my attention by giving me a kazoo. N., his roommate (not M., other N.) kept asking him over and over if he didn't mean wolf whistle.
No reason you can't be nice just because you don't have good sense.
Babbs is on his way to see Bob Dylan in B., Ore. If he hadn't kept it such a secret I might be on my way there, as well. What a stingy little brat baby.
Whoosh. I feel that shit coming on again in my aura. It's like a hot flash but almost not. Somewhere between Christmas and being burried alive. Oh god oh god ohgodohgodohgodohgod ...
baby what you do to me just thinking about me.
wide-on city baby, wide-on city. I feel so full -- everywhere. Only like I'm flying.
I had a dream the other night that I flew. I thought I'd flap my wings, but that's not what happened. I started to feel something so I looked down and the ground just dropped out from underneath my feet. That's how it feels right now/



Every time I go out to water these big wet drops fall from the sky so I go back inside. Then it doesn't rain. I feel like one of those little houses where the man comes out when it's going to rain and the girl comes out for sunshine, only I'm going around and around and can't make up my mind.
You're the only man who's ever given me a kazoo.
bye.
pie



And another thing: I talk a lot. But I bet you already know that.
I think you're a talker, too.
It's just not so around this house.
He's as quiet as a mouse.
Doesn't like it when I talk.
He goes out to take a walk.
I do not like it, Sam I Am.
I do not like these eggs and ham.
If I were a dish of strawberries dipped in white chocolate,
would you eat me before you go to bed?


Isn't it terrible? We've been doing this for a month now. We started out with only Saturdays and now it's every day. I think we're addicted. I'm not worth a damn unless I get that little rush I expect around 3:30-4 p.m . Like that necessary glass of wine sometimes in the evening, just because it's what you do.

I'll be here when you get it up again.

I doin' it for you because you like it.

But I don't know if I trust you.

When we get together, one of the first things I'm going to do is take out my purple sharpie and sign your ass. The deal isn't complete until I sign the register.
Are you laughing?
Am I too cruel?
OK. I'll stop.


Did you see the cap'n's page today? Read the words to the song. That's you and me, baby. It's late in the day of our lives and we find our true soul mate.

Not over the internet. Someone might see us.

You're kidding. We really did it at the same time?
Well for my next trick:
Astral projection.
BTW, I had to get up at 3 a.m. and go to the couch and get myself off bare-handed.
I was afraid he'd hear the vibrator or at least me digging around for it in the dark.
That's what you do to me, baby.
My poor old arthritic hands are a mess.

Do I make you happy, baby? Or do I make you cry?

Maybe I'm a thief. I stole your heart, didn't I, when it belongs to another.


What kinds of demands does she put on you? What kinds of kinky proposals is she making? You'd better be careful now or you'll have both of us mad at you.

And besides that, I have all this crazy energy, a flaring aura, and now you've got my Kundalini "higher than a Georgia pine."
and I'm liking it too much.

I used to say I that I'm a member of the Mile-High Club. Now I can say I've had cybersex.

It's like coming at the same time.

God. I can feel it starting again way down inside my pussy the goddess Kundalini wants out. She wants to grab your cock and have her way. What do you think I should do about that?
Are you getting that full feeling yet?

All right, I recognize that you and I have a past situation possibly from another life, some unfinished business. But what can this mean?
What kind of unfinished business?

I just went out and cut some leaves to smoke and guess what I found? The very starts of buds on the ends of some of the branches I haven't even split. So quick line a bunny (la coneja) I grabbed the sharpest pruners I could find and went around topping everything that needed it. It's so ready to start budding that a clear drop of fluid came out of the ends of each branch I snipped -- Just like that clear drop of fluid hanging off the end of your hard cock right now.
kisses

BTW, you're right on time, today, baby. God I'm so hot for you right now that my pussy has ridges and it hurts. But it hurts real good.

I've got an urge and it's no secret. I came out in a tiny t-shirt and panties to get the mail today and R., the mailman, said, "Let's go, I've got a couple of minutes."
I said OK, and he said, he wouldn't want to do that to R. I said: "You wouldn't be doing it to R., you'd be doing it to me. Then I stood really close to him so he could feel my boobs pushing on his mailman shirt. My nipples were really hard, like they are right now. I'm sure he knows now how hot things can get around here.
He stopped talking and went on with his route, but I'll bet he thought about that for awhile.

God I'm just so damned fucking hot for you. I know you must be insane. There are only two types of men who are attracted to me, the crazies, and those who are too young to know better. Which one are you, baby?
I keep forgetting to mention this, but did you ever notice that our initials are R&R, and M&M? Take a vacation into something sweet, baby, my hot pussy is sweet as tupelo honey.

Now I'm obsessing about it.
What will we do? Fuck right off? Or shall I meet you in a bar in Michigan or somewhere and let you pick me up?
Will you know me when y ou see me? Will you know my scent?
I want your arms around me more than I want to breathe. I am so, so hungry for you and what we will do in the dark with our hands and mouths and noses and ears and dream up to do more of in our minds.

My heart is ripping out of my chest right now and I can barely breathe. Fuck me baby, fuck me good. My pussy is wide open and waiting for your cock.

godIcanfeelitnow. dontstopever. please don't. god I need to have you inside of me or I'm going to die right now., Pleaseplease pleeeeaassse, with honey all over it? give it to me, baby?

anythinganything.
push it all the way in so I really know you're there

A turning point. That's what they were. And now you are one. Who are you, really? What is it you seek? Are we going to find it together? god help us now.
and of course the nasty universe would use sex to bring us together ~

But I know about tantric sex. Never had anyone worth practicing on. I guess you're only as good as who you're with, huh? I'll drag out the books again. I'm over the top in this thing now anyway. can't hurt. Or will it? Will you hurt me, too? Is it you? Are you the one?
OR will you just hurt me good with your cock?

What do you want to watch? Me? with my fingers inside my wet pussy that's coming at the sound of your voice? I'm like Pavlov's dog, only it's Pavlov's pussy.

I'll keep it so hot for you baby ~ just sooooo fucking hot

why don't I just suck your cock?

god. how do you know what I want to hear?

Ask me why anyway. Please PLEEEZE ask me why.

the great work. You know more than you let on. Who the fuck are you anyway? And what are you doing inside my head? Quick. I have to get you out of there before you make a mess.
Too late.
It's a big mess already.
but I bet you already know that.

Yas. When you open this, I'll be asleep Saturday morning. What will you do? Will you take me in your arms and make me feel safe in my dreams? Will you whisper something in my ear?

What will you say while you are doing this rough, deep thing to me?

OK baby, I'm ready for you now.

Then I'll beg you to do it again and again, and again ...

If I don't wake up, will you give it to me a anyway?

baby. you can make me do anything. I know you can. I'll do it for you. I love it. I can feel your cock inside me. It's hot and pushes all the sides.god I'm so hot right now.
Can you tell?

That's it. I just threw my back out squirming in my chair. I'm going to have to get the vibrator to work out that cramped muscle. Oh god, oh god ohgodohgodohgod

I'm so hot and hungry for you right now. My nipples are hard and rubbing against my shirt and it's starting to get warm in here. I have my fingers inside my pussy right now and pretending it's you. I've never wanted to fuck anyone so badly in my life. I can't stand it, I really can't stand it. I want you in my arms with your cock inside me, deep inside that dark place where nobody goes. It's all yours, baby. Just like a sweet young virgin. All clean and steamy.

You and your crazy words. Who are you?
You have me now baby. I'm all yours. Whatever you say. that's what I wanna do. Whatever you want, baby, I'm yours and I'll do it. I want you so much.

Do you wanna call me? Now would be a good time. Just for a minute, you know? I'll go in the back bedroom with mr. vibes.

what are you going to do about it? Don't leave me like this. please. never leave me like this. i want you to fuck me forever.

yes baby, fuck me hard. make me know you're there. make me write bad checks.

with your hands and some of that hot baby oil?

Yes. I want it to hurt. I want to know I'm still alive down there. please make me know I'm still alive.

Ohhhhhhhh yeah. I give good head, baby. do you want some? I know I give good head. It's all yours baby. all yours now, nobody elses.

(530) ***-****
I'm keeping it warm for you, baby.

Did I moan good for you, baby? did you like it when we came for each other?

god baby, it was so good to hear your voice. I love it when a plan comes together.

Right now, you and I are the only two people in the world, baby.

I just went to the bedroom to make the bed and *pick up after myself* and R. came in the front door. We both got to the laundry room at about the same time. I was standing there in my chonies with a phone in one hand and a vibrator in the other. He just kinda did a double take and looked at me, but didn't say anything. Thank god I'd just started a load of wash and I told him I'd just put my sleep shirt in the washer.
kisses baby

kisses, baby.
Oh, here's a rule for us: We only say those words when we're fucking. You know, those words? One of the 3 biggest lies? You choose:
I love you;
The check's in the mail;
One size fits all.
It just saves a lot of trouble, I've found.
kisses, baby

So, you fuck me, roll over, and now you quit talking? See what I mean about those words?
I'm laughing.
Just don't snore.
When I get you in bed ...
just wait. You will die. And so will I. Making Love with bob and pie

god I want you with me now.
waiting only makes it better. Can you hold on?

Caught doing what? I'm not doing anything except getting myself off. He can play if he wants, but fat chance of that. I think his dick ran on alcohol.

it was the best I've had in even longer than 3 years. It goes back before that. you da man, baby, you da man.
kisses

You make me feel like dancin'

God. I don't think we'll ever be able to get out of bed. People will have to bring us food.

It only makes me want you more. And more of you. More often of you, that is.

He probably would have turned around and walked out. He's not been back to the house today. He only came home from the store to get a tool or something out of the garage. I had the same idea, only I was putting a tool into the garage.

Tonight, for some reason, after almost six weeks of raging, hormonal, sexual fantasies, my spirit is quiet and I am finally at peace with myself. And tonight we both sleep under a pulling moon We're not so far apart.
Try thinking about me just before you fall asleep. Let's see if we can meet somewhere, maybe on an astral plane with a dream weaver.
Goodnight, my love.
Pleasant dreams and sleep tight, my love.

The bus cam by and I got on
That's when it all began
Cowboy Neal was at the wheel
Of the bus to Never-never land.

dreaming about you is maddening. Now I've decided I don't want to fuck you any more.
Now I want to make love to you -- long. slow. love. forever. hold me.

Ramble on
Now's the time the time is now
To sing my song

I have a lot in common with Zep. as well as the Dead. I think those songs in my head all the time. What do you have in your head baby? visions? tell me.
tell me somethin' good -- tell me tell me tell me
Tell me that you like it, oh yeah.

do you like it? do you feel warm and full for me baby? all the time? am I in your head? both of them? don't even try to get away.

You keep saying that. No you're not. You are rich in ways few men know.

You didn't answer my question. Is that BoBo I see creeping around in a noticeable lump?

I want you to fuck me to death on that little sink back in the corner.

talk to me baby. I love to hear your soft, mysterious words.

All that joy and incredulous fun in my heart yesterday was there because you put it there. It's the most up I've been in a long time. You gave me that. Then in one comment, you took it away and left me like that all night long. You crushed me and walked away like you didn't care. I thought you blocked my emails. I thought you wanted out for what ever reason -- too intense -- too crazy -- and I thought about all the things you told me like "I'm not going to do anything to queer this deal" and "If I ever did anything to cause you discomfort I would hold you in my arms and say, 'oh baby, I'm sorry I didn't mean to do that'. You just left me with nothing. In one second you took back all my happiness. You robbed me of my joy. It hurt so much. I couldn't sleep. I laid on the couch all night alone with my eyes open and dry. I felt like I'd been kicked in the gut. All the precious jewels I played with yesterday have turned to dirt in my hands today. my heart aches like there's no tomorrow but I'll be damned if I'll cry.

Is now a good time? Do you want me to call? Send the number. It's here but I don't want to mess up the filing system I've worked so hard on the past couple of days when I wasn't outside wearing funny hats.

I want to be in a world of shit with you. I live for make-up sex.

I'm only that way because you love me.
kisses

We've talked about that before too. I will take the starch right out of your wimple, honey. Just wait. I can hardly.

I'm the uptight librarian with her hair in a bun and big glasses. You come in and take me up the stacks. I take off everything except the glasses. We make love over and over, losing ourselves in the ecstasy, feeling every second in each other's arms. I want you inside me now. deeper. please, deeper, harder. I'm all wet and juicy inside -- right now -- so hot I can hardly stand it -- take me baby. Make long, slow love to me forever. Nothing else matters, only this fire in my lower belly that spreads downward to that secret place that wants only you -- then down my legs, shaky legs. wobbly legs. The want to give way and make me lie down in front of you, spread themselves for only you. pleeeaaassse.
oh god i feel you there now, so hard, but not moving, just splitting me apart with your heat. baby.

Not to mention my other good fortune. I only now realize that I have found in you a man with a mind and a cock, and the desire to use them both. Oh I have died and gone to heaven! Fortune has smiled upon this lowly chick with love beads.
kisses baby

When I'm here and you're there at the same time and we do this it makes my panties wet.
I'm ready for you, baby.

I loved Naked Lunch. I rented the movie and watched it over and over. You know that part where those bugs(?) are hung up and those other things are sucking on them? I especially like that part. The sucking part. I thought that was extremely sexual. I remember it made me hot when I first read it. More hot when I watched it. God I'm so hot.

Do you want me to eat her pussy for you and talk to you while I'm doing it?

God you turn me on. I will do things with you I've never done with anyone else. We'll have to use our imaginations. I love those wet salty kisses.

I'm still here. Almost started to answer the fantasy one, but I'll wait until I get back. I have a story to tell you about a 3-way that actually happened, and lately I've flashed on it a couple of times, because of the similarities.

When I get back tonight, I will tell you that story about the 3-way. Also, I will fantasize about giving you head on a roller coaster. I heard on CSI that that's really a kick, to come with all that adrenaline pumping through your system. I hope we don't die.

Are you ready for more, baby? Do you want to know what happened next? OK. I'll tell you.

The best way to do a three way is to take turns. Always two people making love to one person. As it happened, and because she already was on her back, J. was first to be loved.
R. was beside himself with how well his plan had worked, so he directed the show.
"Eat her pussy," he said in my ear as he held my waist with one arm. With the other hand, he jacked his cock. His breath was hot on my neck and I moved slowly down her body with my lips, never taking my eyes from hers.Then I remembered, he must believe I am a "good girl". So I turned to him helplessly and implored, "Show me how."

R. put his face between J. legs, blowing softly on her pussy hair, stroking it with an upward motion, while I watched closely. He licked her clit several times and she pulled her breath sharply. I watched for several minutes while R. lapped at her cunt.

Then I pushed him away.

I got between her legs and wrapped my arms under her legs like guys do when they go down on chicks to hold their legs apart. Instead of holding her legs, I reached up and took her hands in mine. She spread her legs and ground her pelvis, ready for my mouth. Slowly, with my wet tongue all hot and soft, I took her clit in my mouth and held it, not moving. She squeezed my hands and moaned. I let her move a little, but still didn't make a move -- not yet. Let her want it so bad first. Let her want it more than anything in her life!
She started shaking and trembling and making these little pleading sounds, so I let my tongue flatten out on the bottom of her clit and slowly -- ever so slowly -- I sucked her clit in my warm mouth. I knew instinctively the way she wanted it -- because that's the way I like it -- slow and hot and crazy moaning and wanting please god oh god -

I felt her pussy open up in my mouth like a beautiful flower, so warm, so loving, so wanting me not to stop.
She came.
God she came. I thought she would break my hands but I rode it out. I kept my mouth soft all the way through and never hurt or pulled her clit, only the softness of my mouth ever touched her -- and only slowly, maddening, the kind of oral sex people pray for, soft, loving, hot, oral sex.
This isn't the end of the story. There's lots more. But that will wait until another time, my love.
Good night, baby. I'll wait for you by the water.

It gets better. Tell me when you want more.
Does it bother you to think of me with others?

While I was giving J. what for, R. was standing over us, stroking his cock and laughing that little laugh every once in a while. The room was dark, but I could see his eyes were shining with excitement. I'd never seen him so hard. So after J. recovered, I still wasn't finished with her. She lay on her back with her eyes closed, spread out like a dish of fish. I took his cock in my hand and licked the head. I could taste his salty lust and it made my belly twitch with excitement. I was driven by my passion. Then I took his whole cock into my mouth -- as much as I could -- pulling him in my mouth all the way, up and down the length of his hard cock, about six or seven times, and then I stopped and just held it in my mouth. Time stood still.
Turning away from him, I went back to J., who relented willingly. I had to give her a couple of minutes to recover or it goes the other way. Clits like to remember what they just had before moving on to the next step and trying to come again.

Just like the first time, I started out slowly. R. grabbed me from behind and held my waist again like before, only this time he ran his cock up and down my back while I licked J.'s pussy around and around with my tongue I went this time. I took her clit in my mouth and circled it softly with my tongue. By this time, she no longer is moaning softly, she's getting with it like an alley cat and R. can't wait to fuck something, but it's J.'s turn still, and she's on the bottom. So he pulls my face out of her pussy and pushed his cock -- even bigger now! -- into my mouth and moaned, stopping just before it was too late.

Director R. said it was time to do something else. He said J. and I should 69 each other. Still Judith's turn, remember. He couldn't fuck her if she was on the bottom, that would leave me out, so I was on the bottom with Judith going down on me. I was lying on my back with her pussy in my face. God it felt so good. Her long hair brushed my legs as her head moved up and down while she licked my pussy. I was so hot I thought I was going to die. Then R. got on behind J. and fucked her. I could hear the wet noise as his cock went in and out of her cunt and -- I have to stop for a minute and go rub my pussy and think about this for a while.

So R. is fucking J. from behind, leaning over both of us, he's over 6-feet tall with long legs (actually, the guy looks kinda like a scare crow) saying stuff in J.'s ear. I can hear them both breathing really fast, J.'s in short little gasps like a deer running for its life.

The next thing you know, R.'s cock fell out of J.'s pussy on an extra-long stroke. Instinctively, I grabbed it and put it back in. I don't think he noticed.

We're going at it like ferrets in heat, and R. is telling J. to lick my cunt inside and out, inside and out, inside and out, start at the bottom, lick around the outer edge of the vagina, then come back up, around my clit a couple of times and then back into the hole. My pussy was so full and my clit was hard as a rock. I could feel it sticking straight up like a hard-on.

(OK, now, this is the part I've been flashing on and thinking about you)

Then R.'s cock fell out of her cunt again, only this time, I took it into my mouth and teased the head with my tongue. Then I took the whole thing down my throat. I could taste J.'s pussy juice and I wanted more.

I could smell the musk of our scents mingling into one, as our bodies did the same.

R. was surprised when I did that and -- I heard that dirty little laugh -- you know, the one that makes me know I have your full attention?
He leaned over and said into Judith's ear, "Now I'm gettin' a little bit of that like you've been gettin'."

A shiver ran down the length of her spine and bottomed out in her pussy while I had it in my mouth and I knew she was ready to come again. But just before she did, I took R. cock out of her pussy again and licked it clean. Then I put it back into her cunt and ran my tongue around the outside of her vagina, up R.'s cock, back down to J., back to R., back to J. ...

Do you like my party baby? Do you want to cum to the next one?

Back to what I was talking about with R. and J.: So as I watched him fuck her from behind.

I was fascinated by the way her ass wrapped itself around his cock. I liked it so much, in fact, that I visualize it sometimes when I'm working on my own yoni.
But now all I do is remember your voice.

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